3 Positive Actions for when your perfect plans fail

Ruthie Rearing 4 Comments

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Every mom seeks the elusive Golden Key to Balance.  Daily, inner battles wage as we second-guess discipline, housework, and meal selections.  We juggle careers, interpersonal relationships, and self-care.  The frequent question, “How to get it all done?” lurks in the back of our minds.

In our quest for balance, we often lose sight of God’s perspective.  Jesus’ words to frazzled Martha apply to the modern-day wife and mother:

“Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things, but one thing is necessary.  Mary has chosen the good portion, which will not be taken away from her.”(Luke 10:41, ESV)


Motherhood: Balancing perspective; a 7-day devotional series with Sarah Frazer, Ruthie Gray, and Keri Snyder. Sign up today!



Motherhood:  A Balanced Perspective blog series

For the next three weeks, beginning Thursday, February 9, Sarah Frazer, Keri Snyder, and I will share what God has taught us regarding balance in each of our parenting stages.


Motherhood:  A Balanced Perspective devotional series

Next, we’ll go deeper on how to choose the good portion with a 7-day devotional email series called, Motherhood:  A Balanced Perspective, launching the first week in March.

This email series includes Scripture, inspiration, and Mama Mantras to keep you balanced throughout your day.  We’ll also include a beautiful printable of the Mama Mantras for you to use as a visual reminder!


Meet the Balanced Perspective Team



Sarah, from sarahefrazer.com

Sarah is a mother of four little ones (one adopted) and invites you to study God’s Word in your ordinary day. 


Keri, from kerilynnsnyder.com

Keri is a momma of three who believes being intentional and choosing joy is a choice we get to make each day.


Ruthie, from RearReleaseRegroup.com

Ruthie is a momma to grown children and mentors moms to capture joy in each parenting transition.





Sign up for the Balanced Perspective Devotional Series

Sign up here join us for this important series – we can’t wait to share our discoveries with you!  Meanwhile, here is our first post in the blog series.  We’re praying that God teaches you exactly what He wants about His perspective on balance in motherhood.

But wait!  There’s more!


Join the Balanced Perspective Webinar

Thursday, March 2, at 8:30PM, we will be hosting a webinar to launch the email series, Motherhood:  A Balanced Perspective.  Please sign up here to reserve your spot (HINT:  there’s a special giveaway you won’t want to miss)!

And now, for this week’s featured guest post, by – well, yours truly.  ðŸ™‚

3 Positive Actions for when your perfect plans fail



3 positive actions for when your perfect plans fail. How moms can trust God's plans and gain strength to parent and accept God's perspective.



 For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare  and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.  Jeremiah 29:11


As a young mama, I carefully planned out the birth order of my children, spacing them exactly two years apart.

After I had a couple, they rocked my world by being…well, children.  My original plan of having a large family fell to the wayside.  I wondered, “Can I REALLY handle more?”

After 3 years, I went for it again.  God blessed a third time, and although I was thankful, I decided to be done

Only God wasn’t.

He sent a little present the first month I accepted a part-time job outside the home.

And I was angry. 

For the entire 9 months.

After she was born, I grew even more frustrated because she never slept.  #exhaustion

But God dealt with my heart.  “I know the plans I have for you”.

Now, I’m thankful God gave me four children.  (Did I mention the last set was spaced 2 years apart and born in the exact months as the first set?)

(Only God could plan that.)

God was in charge all along.  He blessed my pregnancy efforts the first 3 times, indulging in my little plan.

But because that last baby wasn’t my idea, I allowed myself to get out of sorts.

It never crossed my mind that God could have closed my womb or allowed miscarriage.

Perspective is something young mamas grapple with.  Screaming babies, long nights, and sibling rivalry pull us in many directions, and we struggle to let go and trust that God knows best.



3 positive actions for when your perfect plans fail. How moms can trust God's plans and gain strength to parent and accept God's perspective.



But His point of view is the perfect perspective, because His wisdom is higher than ours.

Twenty years later, I reached the caregiving stage and the bottom of my world dropped out once again. Both my parent’s health failed at the same time; hospital emergencies, major surgeries, and rehabilitation ensued.

I’d just pulled my daughters out of high school, determined to homeschool them to graduation.

From my point of view, it was lousy timing.

But God decided we weren’t going with my plan, and I wasn’t in charge.

Being an only child, I was the sole caregiver.

But this time, I didn’t get angry.

This time, I learned to bow my will:

“Ok Lord, obviously my plans aren’t the same as Yours.  Just teach me whatever it is You want me to learn.”

And He did. 

He also enabled me to follow through with the girl’s homeschool and graduations.

Dear mom, what’s frustrating you today that you have no control over?  What has God allowed in your life that you simply don’t understand?

God sees you, and He allowed that.

When our plans are frustrated, we have two choices:

  1. We can rebel (kick, scream, cry, get angry)
  2. We can regroup (return and rest in His presence)

Which will you choose?

Trust me when I say the latter brings MUCH more peace than the former!  It’s not easy, but God says in His Word He knows the plans He has for us.

Plans for a future and a hope.


3 positive actions for when your perfect plans fail. How moms can trust God's plans and gain strength to parent and accept God's perspective.



3 Positive Actions for when your perfect plans fail


Before you have a meltdown the next time your perfect plan goes south, STOP.  Pause, and do these three things:

  1. Commit your plans to the Lord (Proverbs 3:6)
  2. Place your trust in Him when your plans fail  (Proverbs 3:5)
  3. Adjust your perspective – remember, He’s working everything to His glory (Proverbs 3:7)


His plans may not coincide with ours, but His are always perfect.  Accept His love, place your trust in Him, and be comforted in His perfect peace.

God has a perfect plan for you, and even if they’re not the same as yours, they’re for the best.  Remember – we walk by faith; not by sight.


What is God allowing in your life that you’re resisting?


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