7 Powerful truths for when you can't control anger. Problem solving for moms failing at anger management, sound counseling and help for how to change.

7 powerful truths for when you can’t control anger

Ruthie Rearing 6 Comments

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Karen  erupted all over her husband and kids – even kicked the dog.   Slamming pots and pans in righteous indignation, she screamed at the top of her lungs, “IF I DON’T GET SOME HELP IN THIS KITCHEN ASAP NO ONE IS EATING TONIGHT!!!  They didn’t unload the dishwasher, the dog pooped in the house (because no one walked him) and the family lounged in front of the tv – discarded socks, books, and backpacks strewn across the floor.

Sound familiar?

Doesn’t the verse say, “Be angry” (Ephesians 4:26)?! That alone confirms that anger is natural and necessary to propel us into fighting against wrong-doing!


7 Powerful truths for when you can't control anger. Problem solving for moms failing at anger management, sound counseling and help for how to change.

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Well…yes and no. Yes – anger at wrong behavior is necessary in order to fight for what is right.

No – erupting all over the fam (anger turned to wrath) is not right. (The rest of Ephesians 4:26 says “and sin not”.)


Anger is  a powerful, shovel-like tool – you can use it improperly to bang people over the head, or you can use it properly to dig as a motivational tool. ~Chip Ingram, How to be good and mad


“Well, I just can’t help it. Their behavior is inexcusable and I’m literally at the end of my rope, plus I’m exhausted from CLEANING UP AFTER EVERYONE 24/7!!!”

I know. Been there, done that, got the t-shirt.

Still doesn’t make it right. You know you feel terrible after screaming up a lung and destroying everyone in your path.

That’s anger gone wrong.

Here’s the good news: YES YOU CAN control anger.

You see, the reason we think controlling anger is beyond our reach is due to our unbelief.

We dismiss the fact that it’s even possible.  And if we don’t believe God can change our behavior, then that means we don’t have a correct view of God.


Can't control your mom rage? Christ has an answer for that! Sound counsel from God's Word. Click To Tweet


Christ transforms a raging lunatic

Remember the crazy lunatic who roamed the graveyard and broke the chains that bound him in Mark 5? This guy was uncontrollable. No one could do anything with him. His demon-possession lead others to believe all hope was lost.

But when Jesus and his disciples got off the boat and saw the guy, He commanded the unclean spirits to come out of him. It wasn’t without a fight, because many demons possessed this man. But Jesus solved the problem by transferring them to pigs, who ran down the mountain into the ocean and committed “Suey-cide”. (Ba-dump-pump.)

The people were amazed to see the crazy guy wearing clothes and talking rationally. In fact – they were so spooked (and angry about the pigs), they made Jesus leave town!


7 Powerful truths for when you can’t control anger


1. When we are alone and unaccountable, the Enemy possesses great liberty.

>>The man lived in a desolate place (among tombs) – alone, which gave the devil great advantage.


2. No human being can break the chains of our anger.

>>He was out of control and no person could help him.


3. When we erupt in anger, we destroy ourselves – as per the Enemy’s desire.

>>He tortured himself, because he was unhappy.


4. Our desire to overcome anger is planted by Christ.

>>Christ’s power alone made the man run to be relieved of this great burden.


5. Since Christ planted the desire to overcome, He will also deliver.

>>Christ’s power alone delivered the man from the Enemy.


6. Your strong propensity toward anger and how long you’ve struggled to control it doesn’t matter – Christ is stronger!

>>”My name is Legion, for we are many” – a legion is a number of soldiers in arms. It denotes military power. We “wrestle not against flesh and blood” (Eph. 6:12)!


7. This same Christ that healed that man is the One Who saves us from our sins, and provides a way of escape – the Word of God!  You can’t control your anger – but GOD can!

>>Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand the wiles of the devil.


Anger, left unchecked, can do irreparable damage.

BUT – we have a God Who is Greater, Kinder, Stronger.

He provides a way of escape! But you must believe. Faith is the key to unlock this door.


7 Powerful truths for when you can't control anger. Problem solving for moms failing at anger management, sound counseling and help for how to change.



Help for your temper

From the book, "Count to Nine; 9 Liberating Steps for Mom Frustration and Anger". Tips for applying Scriptural methods to curb anger. Dear mom, you have the tools to overcome anger and frustration!
In Count to Nine, moms discover a Scripturally sound, methodical approach for taming the temper. Ruthie Gray, mother of four and grandparent of two, gently guides frazzled mothers of all ages toward God’s Word, His view on anger, and the nine steps to overcoming wrath.

In this ebook, you will learn

*The surprising reasons behind your anger

*The mind-blowing truth of God’s view on anger

*One eye-opening tactic for changing your reactions

*How the staggering power of unbelief can keep you from change

*How to triumph through one key attitude adjustment

*How to gain victory over a life-long stronghold

*And much, much more!

The author, Ruthie Gray, transparently shares her own motherhood struggles, instantly connecting with moms through her “been there” approach. Moms will find victory, new hope, and support through this encouraging method of actionable Scripture verses and Scripture prayers.


Dear mom, isn’t it time for you to Count to Nine?


From the book, "Count to Nine; 9 Liberating Steps for Mom Frustration and Anger". Tips for applying Scriptural methods to curb anger. Dear mom, you have the tools to overcome anger and frustration!







Featured posts from last week’s Link up!

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Something I found to be most helpful in making me feel like I had some purpose in life during my ‘stuck’ periods has been to decide each day on one big thing and two small things that I wanted to accomplish. Obviously, my big thing of choice wouldn’t be inventing a cure for the Ebola Virus or writing a New York Times best selling novel. It could be something like:

  • Reply to 5 emails;
  • Grocery shop for the week. Or even more minute than that;
  • Take a shower!

Pick just one big thing to do that is realistic and matches up to the level of stamina you can currently exert.

~Tehila from Women Abiding on 9 Ways to get unstuck when you’re in survival mode


God had not forgotten about Noah. No, His eyes had been on Noah the entire time. The same is true for us. God Has Not Forgotten Us. He knows our situation. He’s aware of what we need and when we need it. When we are struggling, we may feel like God is nowhere in sight. We may not hear His voice or sense His presence. Noah probably felt the same way. (The Bible doesn’t mention that God spoke to him during his one year cruise on the ark.)

~Alisa from Flourishing Today, 4 Ways to overcome life’s challenges


I try and have one such chore where somebody is being trained. If I have too many chores needing a training phase, or too many kids doing chores in the training phase it is all too hard. Once one child has learnt a chore, and learnt to do it well, it becomes their responsibility for a while to cement the skill. Meanwhile I take on another chore and another child. Eventually we rotate chores so that they are learning a full spectrum of household tasks.

~Belinda from Live Life with your Kids, How to teach your children to work hard

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Comments 6

  1. Such wisdom on dealing with anger, and realizing WHAT IT IS! An attack from Satan on us and the people around us. I never really linked anger with disbelief, but I think you’re right on, Ruthie. Lots of times we’re not really expecting God to transform us.

    1. Post

      Just because it’s hard doesn’t mean it can’t be conquered. All too often we give up on ourselves – when really, we’re giving up on God! Nothing is too hard for Him – no chain too strong!

      Good to see you (as always), Betsy! Thanks for being faithful! 🙂

  2. Great points here! I really love how you dispel the lie that we can’t control anger. We often try to convince ourselves of the same thing with our thoughts. It’s simply not true. We may not be able to control how we feel, but we can control how we respond to those feelings! Thanks for sharing this today!

    1. Post

      Good to see you, Alisa and thanks for your sharing feedback! God designed us to have emotions but He also allows a way of escape. We have to pick up the tools He’s provided and allow Him to work!

  3. I love love love this. I tend to explode for no reason or at the wrong time. I love the Scripture and just highlighted it in my Bible and made a note for future reference … because as much as I wish I didn’t need it, I know that I will.

    1. Post

      We all do, Stephanie! We must rely on our Lord to bring the victory through His Word and prayer. You are not alone! Thanks for your transparency, girl. I know how much you love your little guy! And thanks for your sweet comment.

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